making room for what you want

Many hundreds of lifetimes ago, a friend sent me a clipping from a newspaper.  I may have it still, in the stacks of detritus I had to save (for some reason!), but I dunno where.

The author used the metaphor of a red sweater.  The title and content approximate this:

Make Room in Your Life for What You Want

She had a perfectly serviceable red sweater in her closet, but didn’t wear it very often because it made her butt look big. Or something.  She didn’t feel good when she wore it.

So, when she saw the most beautiful red sweater in a shop window, she didn’t buy it because she already had a red sweater and didn’t have the money to be buying yet another one.

She figured out that if she’d give away her own red sweater that made her feel crummy, she could have the new, shiny red sweater that made her feel great.


Make room in your life for what you want.  Draw lines and boundaries and mean it.  It’s OK to like what you like and to want what you want.   Otherwise, you’re living someone else’s life, and really, that doesn’t work.   Life can be cut short in an instant and gee-whillikers, wouldn’t it be cool to have fun NOW?!

What’s one thing that just popped into your head?  Why not head for it and see what happens?  It’s OK if it’s a person that isn’t fitting….

PS.  Don’t be daunted by the price you’ll pay–there has to be a trade-off.  Loss for gain.  Et damn cetera.  Just hang on through the change; it can be cold without the shelter of a familiar sweater, but doesn’t have to be scary.


23 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. neowatercolour
    Dec 14, 2012 @ 09:23:23

    Loved this post L, very synchronistic, am really struggling with some of these tough “boundary” issues myself, this very minute – so helpful to see your words, Thankyou :-) V xx


    • lahgitana
      Dec 14, 2012 @ 09:29:50

      aw gee, Vee. it’s a constant dance, isn’t it?!

      it occurs to me that we may discard something, but it doesn’t mean it’s gone forever. hell, everydamnpigfrogthing is temporary!

      yep, jump! just remember what it is that anchors you and you’ll weather the, er, weather! <:-D


  2. ~ Ivy ~ (@ivyft)
    Dec 14, 2012 @ 13:34:37

    Wow, bloggers of the world are inspired today! Me likes this post so darn much…. Why not have fun NOW? There’s no reason, go enjoy whatever sweater IS in your closed now! Thanks for the wonderful inspiration, L.


  3. Jude
    Dec 14, 2012 @ 13:47:26

    Love it! :) :)


  4. 10000hourstobe
    Dec 14, 2012 @ 16:17:54

    I saw these wonderful paintings in a little Gig Harbor cafe where I was meeting a friend. Made me realize, I wanted to go home and spread paint around. Thanks for the reminder that it is OK to let go of stuff we don’t want to do, wear, see, live with, and so on. Hooray.


  5. FeyGirl
    Dec 15, 2012 @ 04:46:15

    SO true. SO true. I’m going through this process en masse, now. Of course it was further cemented / inspired by a life change, alas… There’s nothing like a life change to really look at what makes you happy, and purge the old to make way for the new and happy-happy-joy-joy.


    • lahgitana
      Dec 15, 2012 @ 06:13:31

      Life changes are, er, not easy, and en masse?! holy guacamole! It’s amazing to have the wherewithal to keep whittling away at a life that is already changed. But why not? Best time to do it, methinks.


  6. sweetdaysundertheoaks
    Dec 15, 2012 @ 07:51:56

    Good words L. I am trying to live in the moment. This moment all is well and good. Enjoy it. My book, Zen Living is permanently attached to my hands almost.. :)


  7. Dianda
    Dec 16, 2012 @ 03:04:39

    But what if you don’t want to make room? :(


    • lahgitana
      Dec 16, 2012 @ 06:33:39

      hmmmm…. say more, Dianda, I’m curious about what you’re thinking (especially with the frowny face).


      • Dianda
        Dec 16, 2012 @ 07:26:13

        Well, for example, I would want Limbo kitty, but with two cats and a small apartment I can’t make room.


        • lahgitana
          Dec 16, 2012 @ 07:36:34

          i wonder if it could work a little sideways–you may not be able to have him live with you now, but he is now visiting inside your apartment. perhaps you made room by letting him come in (because you have been concerned about Hiro and Suki’s reactions).

          and–you are thinking of moving house and taking Limbo Kitty with you. that’s making room…

          so, making room can happen in thinking I believe. Shove things around the way we shove furniture in a room to see how things work. ??!! <:-D


        • lahgitana
          Dec 16, 2012 @ 07:47:55

          unfortunately, we don’t always get what we want right away–it is more of a process often. keep the goal in mind and make decisions based on that goal.


  8. JustI
    Dec 16, 2012 @ 06:35:23

    Hi Laurel, I was blog surfing and found this… it fits in with your theme and an interesting read:
    I haven’t been online much because my computer is giving up the ghost. Once it overheats, I’m done for a while


    • lahgitana
      Dec 16, 2012 @ 07:04:11

      I have cruised her site beyond that one essay, which was wondrous. You shared a person whose words about her brain injury mesh with my experience. I now feel less weird in my brokenness. Thank you. I will re-post her page.

      Hope your computer cools it so you can be back here soon. You have brought so much to me, lady!


      • JustI
        Dec 16, 2012 @ 18:05:07

        I’m glad you liked her blog. I was reading about her bicycling trip to Israel and she mentioned her brain injury. Interesting reading and she mirrored your own theme!

        I’m getting a new computer for Christmas, so this one needs to make it another week…crossing my fingers! I’ve spent the past week backing up my documents and pictures before they disappear

        Talk again soon and Merry Christmas! :)


        • lahgitana
          Dec 16, 2012 @ 19:29:27

          yaaaay, Santa! hope all the backing up is successful.

          VERY interesting reading! (thank you again for your thoughtfulness in taking the time to post a link.)


  9. Trackback: note to self: beware emotional landmines | Rockin' the Purple!

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