tarred with the same brush

One of my failings, and perhaps assets, is to practice the art of the benefit of the doubt.  Great expression, that.

As my years have added up, the number of tries per person, entity, or weather phenomenon, has lessened to sit concrete-like at two.  Two tries and yerrrrrrr outtttt!   Or:  two tries and I really and truly believe you are what you show me you are.

I have given the US mortgage industry–wait don’t go!!–their two tries.  Each mortgage company I encounter henceforth will get no benefit of the doubt because they’ve all just been tarred by the same stinky brush.

Today our refinanced house loan closes.  Last Tuesday, I was very well-behaved at the signing, not even swearing when the title company whipped out forms the mortgage lender hadn’t ever shown us.  Same thing happened in the last signing, coming on 5 years ago.  This time I only grumbled and sighed histrionically.  OK, did growl, but I hope it was sotto voce (under my breath).

I got a call this morning, yet another morning where I announced to Big (and to the Universe) that I was not going to answer the phone.  We’ve been getting political calls and spam calls, and I am sick to death of answering the phone ringing in my own damn house to be greeted by a flippin’ recording.  I digress.

So, phone rang, answering machine did its thing (yes, we have one of those still), and when I heard our lender’s voice, I picked up immediately because I assumed she was calling to tell us the loan had closed as scheduled.

Instead of that news, she asked for a bank statement that we gave her 4-5-6 weeks ago, the bank statement upon which this whole refinance exercise is based.  What????!!!  I was confused.  OK, so I get confused very easily, very quickly.  But didn’t we give you that?!  What?  The loan won’t close without it?

Stand still, you are being tarred.  Feathers up next.

(Here, I am swearing in my head, but not typing the words.  Some of ’em are hard to spell.)

A little amusement for you, and maybe me:  at least twice in the 1-inch-high stack o’ papers to sign (I am not exaggerating!), we had to sign to acknowledge that we, the consumers, would not commit loan fraud.

Hey you folks holding the money, just keep on blaming the consumer.  I want that form to be counter-signed by the mortgage lender.  Then it would make flippin’ sense to flippin’ include that flippin’ nonsense in that flippin’ 1-inch-high stack o’ papers for us to flippin’ sign.

That is all.

We now return to art and kittens.


18 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. neowatercolour
    Oct 29, 2012 @ 13:48:25

    I’m glad you said “wait, don’t go” after mentioning the mortgage word – or I would have missed a brilliant post :-) I know the situation stinks, but you made me LOL – neat ! Thanks L , and as we say here, don’t let the B*******s get you down :-)


    • lahgitana
      Oct 29, 2012 @ 18:04:30

      hee hee!

      I grew up with the Latin version of that sentiment. Learned it from Mom! Allow me to share: “Illegitimati non carborundum.”

      Nah, I”m not down at all. I went to the art store after that stoooopid stuff and forgot all about it! (Yeah, so I’ve got memory problems! They should do me some good sometime. Just sayin’!)


  2. minlit
    Oct 29, 2012 @ 14:14:47

    Some day, when we go to that concert, as we queue like sardines (do sardines queue?) for our pre-ordered interval drinks, I will tell you what is going on here and now in relation to effing mortgages…..


    • lahgitana
      Oct 29, 2012 @ 18:11:58

      I told you those swear words were hard to spell!

      Lordy, you too with the effed-up mortgages?! Ooooo!! Ooooo, which reminds me–my next post should be from Joss!!! Speaking of effed-up and we’re-all-gonna-die! <:-D

      Drinking is the only answer, I'm pretty sure. (Note to self: do more.)

      Yes, sardines queue, but they tend to be ass to ass instead of nose to bum! Uh…. that glass of wine in my Winnie the Pooh cup, thank you very much, was just right!


  3. ~ Ivy ~ (@ivyft)
    Oct 29, 2012 @ 14:19:50

    Brilliant post, indeed! You have my sympathy…


  4. sweetdaysundertheoaks
    Oct 29, 2012 @ 17:10:30

    Yes Yes Yes I hear ya! CH says he loves it. He was a reluctant banker in his second career after retiring from the Army. Will you still talk to me? I am feeling a bit like life’s a bitch the last few days. I am sorry for the tangled up armpit of a mess they are dealing you.


    • lahgitana
      Oct 29, 2012 @ 18:08:07

      Welllllll, since he was *reluctant*…. !!! >:-D Besides, he gets brownie points for being in the military and no doubt was paid peanuts! Go, CH!

      May I thank you for those last two sentences?! I shall be copying them off and saving them on my desktop! hahahahahaha! Tho’ I’m very sorry you’ve been feeling, er, not your usual chipper self. Go find a barn!

      We’ve closed and there were apologies. I didn’t actually see them in the email because I didn’t bother to read her dang email! grrrr! That’s what Big Mister is for!


  5. jacquiefioramonti
    Oct 30, 2012 @ 12:31:02

    Oh my goodness! Sounds like. .. well like very confusing and all too much for me to comprehend. The thing with apologies is that, if we don’t get them we’re peeved that ‘I didn’t even get a simple apology’ but when we do, they don’t give us our precious time back or get rid of that extra grey hair we’ve inherited from the situation :-) Hope all ok now.


    • lahgitana
      Oct 30, 2012 @ 12:44:14

      It really was confusing, Jacquie. The apology this time around seemed like a “it’s better to apologize than ask permission” situation–in other words, freely given, but probably meaningless because of the complexity of the situation!!!

      All fine. Done. It was worth it to speak up–maybe she’ll be more careful with the next people. sheesh!


  6. heretherebespiders
    Oct 30, 2012 @ 12:54:37

    Done! Done is good. Cursing is also good. Grizzleflicks.


  7. LifeOfBun
    Mar 13, 2013 @ 21:47:58

    Woa I found you through verymuchdutch.wordpress.com, you have such a passionate blog :) I love the dry humour in your rants. ;D


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