stuck in traffic with Charmayne watching the world go by

Location:  a lovely island in the Puget Sound area of Washington State.  I’d been living with Charmayne for quite some time–she was my father’s 5th wife and she and I really loved one another.  My father bolted the country, leaving her behind, and me too since I was temporarily staying with them trying to recover my interrupted adult life.  (Father-stories another time.)  So, he left and I stayed with his soon-to-be 5th ex-wife.

She and I were both morose for different reasons and were either completely silly or very quiet.  We went on errands together–post office, grocery, that stuff.  We cruised antique shops–in one of her lives she was a dealer and so had very cool stuff.  We didn’t spend money because we were both broke, but we didn’t really care.

Charmayne was an artist–she designed clothes and jewelry and also created funny little sculptures.  She was kooky and smart and very funny….

On one of those days of erranding, we got stopped at an intersection with the one road/ 55mph-highway through the island:  a long slow line of shiny black hearses and 20 or 30 private cars following, lights on, crawling along.  We were in quiet mode, just sat and sat and sat and watched that line of cars.

Charmayne broke the silence:  “Look, it’s a parade, and I don’t like any of the floats!”

My dear Charmayne died at 60 years old in spring 2000 from her third bout of breast cancer.

© No Stealing!  That’s what the little c in the circle means!
© lahgitana and Rockin’ the Purple, 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to lahgitana and Rockin’ the Purple with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

12 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. heretherebespiders
    Dec 01, 2011 @ 13:11:26

    A unique character; sorry she’s lost to you, but glad you have good memories like this one.


    • lahgitana
      Dec 01, 2011 @ 13:15:43

      She was a character. She influenced me greatly with her dignity after my father’s extremely poor behavior. Thank you. Yes, I fling that parade statement out in her memory, always.


  2. heretherebespiders
    Dec 01, 2011 @ 13:27:04

    Ah, dignity. Don’t think I’ve met it, yet.
    Seems a few people this week are feeling losses, new and old. Is it the holiday season?


    • lahgitana
      Dec 01, 2011 @ 15:02:32

      Dignity came late for me, but I at least have experienced it and try hard to step back into it at certain times.

      Holidays? Maybe. Do you think? I’ve spent much time being contemplative because of being in the workshop–it’s just me and my music and being artful….


  3. IsobelandCat
    Dec 01, 2011 @ 13:27:48

    Lovely post Lahgitana.
    You obviously have very fond memories of this special woman.
    Thanks for sharing.


    • lahgitana
      Dec 01, 2011 @ 15:05:02

      Thank you, Isobel. She was a crack-up, apart from being very creative. I’ll re-post the movie we discovered during that very sad t!me. Oddball funny! –Laurel


  4. Kathryn McCullough
    Dec 01, 2011 @ 16:55:47

    I’m so sorry you lost Charmayne. Gosh, it hurts to lose the ones we love. This was a lovely tribute to her, however.

    (By the way, I have added you to my blogroll.)



    • lahgitana
      Dec 01, 2011 @ 17:21:28

      Hi Kathy, How lovely of you to add Rockin’ to your site!

      Yes, it does hurt. The hurt simmers down, but it doesn’t go away. What is that physics axiom: matter may be neither created nor destroyed? Feelings, same thing. They gotta exist somewhere!

      I had a dream about Charmayne a few months after she died where she came to me and said that she was just fine. Quite liked that! (It was her, not some silly ole dream!)


  5. sweetdaysundertheoaks
    Dec 02, 2011 @ 06:54:22

    Lahgitana, a sweet funny post. Thank heavens for the “characters” in our lives. They help us get through, even when they are gone their memory can make a bad day better and give us a chuckle. I’m sorry you are without her, but I believe you when you say she told you she was just fine!


  6. minlit
    Dec 03, 2011 @ 00:41:55

    There’s something surreal about that post. Apart from the last line. My mum was given 18 months to live with a v. aggressive form of breast cancer about 6 years ago. She completely recovered – one of the lucky ones.


    • lahgitana
      Dec 03, 2011 @ 06:37:01

      I wonder why surreal? I’d like to hear more.

      She is one of the lucky ones, yes. Science can’t completely control those replicating cells. I’m sure that must have been a horrible 18 months, D. Your children must have been quite young at that time, too….

      Thanks for commenting….


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