My friend has courage and requires the same of me

How am I supposed to act?  I want to be my regular ole self, but am more than usually keenly aware of the brevity of life.  I think of her every single day and wonder if today the chemo finally caught up with her and is making her tired and unable to do all that she had been doing.

So, I am my regular ole self, but the sadness is always there.  In the quiet moments, of which I create many for myself, I think of Mrs. Ploppy and her journey through life that at this moment has given her a glimpse of the end of her corporeal journey.  She has approached this time with humor and is unfailingly positive.  The courage she displays is …that of a true hero:  facing the fear and moving forward anyway.

She plays with her iPad during the long chemo sessions and dozes when the anti-allergic-reaction meds kick in.  The room where she has those sessions is a little larger than her living room at home, but it is medically sterile with reclining chairs and an IV pole behind each one.   There are people here and there in the chairs, sometimes visiting, often resting.  A woman in one of those chairs visited with Mrs. Ploppy and seemed to both of us to be a-knockin’ at Death’s door and he was about to welcome her home.

Then I look at my friend Mrs. Ploppy again where she reclines under the blanket and see the same funny, acerbic woman I have known, a little quiescent, but present, oh so present to the tubing that enters a port through her chest.  That port was surgically placed high on her chest wall and is the entry point for the weekly chemical soup that will save her life.  I say “will” save her life because it is what she says and I choose to believe her.

Mrs. Ploppy, you are with me.  Let’s watch an Eddie Izzard DVD and howl along with him as he stabs, dances, and riffs!

© No Stealing!  That’s what the little c in the circle means!
© lahgitana and Rockin’ the Purple, 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to lahgitana and Rockin’ the Purple with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Sharon
    Oct 15, 2011 @ 18:09:11

    You are a wonderful friend. They are rare.


  2. schlurpytalkin
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 11:33:02

    Courage my cottage cheese hiney. its just living. Everything else keeps bobbing along in this linear universe we live in and so shall I. So no sadness chicky! I’m here today and I’m not sad ……so as my aunt once told me “don’t borrow future sorrows”. I have a greater statistical chance of kickin it in a car crash in the next 5 years than I do of this cancer. although that would be very very rude if that happened.
    Love ya!


  3. lahgitana
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 13:10:31

    See what I mean? Acerbic!

    Living takes courage, Mrs. Ploppy. Facing change takes courage. Just because your courage is quiet and comes naturally doesn’t mean you ain’t courageous. So there!

    You can’t stop me from admiring you, dearie! haha! and neener-neener!
    I am not sad for a possible incorrect outcome; rather I am sad because this situation blows! So maybe the anger came first and has dulled to sadness?

    However–wait for it!–I admire your attitude/fortitude and I take courage and inspiration from your kick-ass nose-thumbing to the cancer. (Now she’s going to write to me and say– “Bah! Inspiration! Bah! That’s ridiculous!”)

    Your stance has helped me change my attitude about yet another injury I have been struggling with for the better part of a year. Living in chronic pain needs attitude help.

    You’re covered in cheese! You’re covered in cheese!

    Love you too, O Cancer Girl!


  4. schlurpytalkin
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 15:34:49

    Well now you’ve just made me hungry. Anyone for a grilled cheese?


  5. lahgitana
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 16:52:23

    Ooooo, sounds fabulous! We just decided to have cheesy nachos. Cheese. One of the Food Groups. Along with M&Ms, orange juice, and bacon.


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