One of those painful life lessons

It’s best to learn this lesson early, fast, and thoroughly so we don’t have to do as the Buddha exhorts against, strive and yearn.

Do we notice when a person just isn’t that interested in us?  I bet we do, even if we can’t put words to the realization.  Do we plow ahead anyway and want to be the intimate of friend, lover, husband, wife, brother, sister, father, mother?  We do.

We want to connect.  We want to be loved.  We want to share the minutiae of our lives and have that other actually care about that stuff, or at least regard us deeply enough that they put up with the blah-blah-blah we egest.  We try to do our best to do the right thing by that person–share, pay 1/2 the bill or splain why not, know that everything will equal out in the end anyway, do a little extra that requires us to go out of our own ingrained way, not spend too much time recounting that wacky dream from last night.  (Therapists get paid to listen to that stuff, but we foist it on our loved ones.  The loved ones who make eye contact and smile and frown at the right moments are golden!)  Trust that that attitude and intention of doin’ the right thing is returned.

Sometimes it’s not and that’s when the inequality of interest hits by popping up like one of those police training thingies that jumps up and goes smack in the kisser!  (I’m actually thinking of the part of the movie Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy when our heroes were on Planet Vogon with those paddle-creatures secreted under the sand that would pop-up-and-go-smack if they sensed an independent thought.)

Best to admit to the inequality fast and decide if you can be satisfied to be a part-time friend, lover, husband, wife, brother, sister, father, mother.  Just don’t ignore the knowledge.  It hurts too much when the tipping point comes. 

All that non-Buddha disappointment.  Waaaaaaaaah!  


© No Stealing!  That’s what the little c in the circle means!
© lahgitana and Rockin’ the Purple, 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to lahgitana and Rockin’ the Purple with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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